I think it is time to institute a mandatory “Work Etiquette” course for each and every colored employee that joins my company. And when I say colored I mean blacks and Latinos we are both really out of line with some of the things we do and how we act at work. This is just getting out of hand. We have people who clearly jumped out of the “short bus” and into the workplace. We have people who do not understand what proper work attire is. We have people who cannot READ or WRITE English. How are they getting hired you may ask, well that’s really neither here nor there. This is becoming an epidemic and I for one cannot stay silent about the matter any longer.
When your dress is really a shirt:
Why would one wear a shirt as a dress in the first place? But if you choose to do so, do this on your own time, when you are not working in a corporate office. When I walk behind you in the hall and I can see your behind, we have a problem. In addition to inappropriately short clothing, we are having an issue with some folks wearing clothes that are clearly 5 sizes too small. How in the he11 do you get in those pants? I can’t imagine that you can breathe well with them cutting into you like that; also don’t you realize that your camel toe may cause infections? In addition, a metallic shoe is very nice for going out, but is not really good to wear in the office, unless you work at a disco or some place where flashy attire is acceptable.
When you cant speak English:
If someone asks you about an email and you claim that you “Sunt it” to someone last week, and they have never “sunt it back” you need a refresher course in grammar. When you send people emails and they have to literally decipher them before they can have any clue as to what you are asking, you may need to go sit in on your child’s English classes.
If you send out emails to people in ALL CAPS you need to be shot, this is not only offensive to the reader, but its just completely annoying. Now there is one guy who a friend of mine has decided that he has his own language due to the fact that you cant understand most of what he says in general. She has named it “Queen”. He speaks to everyone including coworkers and people over email in the company as if he is at the club, ex “Hey girlfriend, you know what im sayin, OK!” imagine the stereotypical g@y and this is him. Although this is fine for your daily life, I am sure none of us talk to friends and family like we do our coworkers, but its not really appropriate when you email someone about an issue and you use your Queen speak, and they end up forwarding the message because they have absolutely no ideas to what you need from them.
When the other Blacks are annoyed by you:
It is a sad day when the other coloreds in the building don’t want to speak to you. We all know that when we see other people in the office that look like us we get happy and 90% of the time will speak to you. When you are so tacky and ridiculous, that we don’t even want to claim you, you know there is something very wrong. And please believe it is not people “Hating” on you, if all other blacks in the building shun you, you need to take a hard look at yourself. I have been in offices where there was only me and the toothless janitor, and I would speak to him every chance I could! But when you show up to work looking and acting like “those ni&&as” then yeah, we are going to steer clear of you. You are making the white ppl uncomfortable which in turn makes us uncomfortable as they are the one who run the dam company, we can’t really afford to have you making us look crazy!
What can we do to stop this?
Just like new employee orientation, we need to get these people in a room and give an extensive “what to do and what not to do while in corporate America” type class. Little things like “why it is not ok to yell across the lunch room” will be covered, and also how it is not appropriate to talk about how you “fought that nuthafckin bit&* cuz you found out she was messing with your boo” while in the elevator. We will explain how the whole floor does not need to know about your weave and what type of hair you buy, nor do they need to know about your trifling baby-daddy. We will have an outing to various stores to show examples of what appropriate work wear is, and what is not (metallic h0 shoes and mini skirts)….
Why this really wont work in the real world:
The problem with just walking up to the offenders and making a suggestion to them about these issues is that you are sure to get your bougie ass jumped as soon as you walk out of the building. That or they will just go clean off on you right there, as we know they do not care about people in the workplace being all up in their business. You will be called names, and verbally assaulted like you probably haven’t been since maybe high school. Your car may get a tire iron thrown through the windshield. These and many other reasons are why I just keep my mouth shut, I sit with my bougie friends at lunch time and we talk sht about these people. Its really the only thing you can do without catching a beat down. Good day to you and Good luck.
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